


I Want To Know How You Feel

by elutherya



Category: A.C.E (Beat Interactive Band), ONEUS (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bikers, Boys in Skirts, Comfort, M/M, Minor Kang Yuchan | Chan/Everyone, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:07:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28910598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elutherya/pseuds/elutherya
Summary: It sits on Yuchan’s mind, the way Dongju’s eyes linger on him when they’re standing under the neon lights of the parking lot. He thinks nothing of it at first, used to the curious looks people usually give him, but where often it's dismissive, Dongju watches him differently. His eyebrows draw down, lips twisting and head cocked just the tiniest bit, and Yuchan knows that he’s figuring something out.
Relationships: Kang Yuchan | Chan & Son Dongju | Xion
Comments: 12
Kudos: 64
Collections: Little Beasts





	I Want To Know How You Feel

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Omegatits](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Omegatits/gifts).



> This was... a very very quick story. It's part of a much bigger universe, but that's not necessary to this part, but if you would like a glance into their lives, the collection has all the other stories. Yuchan's look has always been incredibly important to me with this series, and I've always wanted to touch on Dongju with it. I explored Dongju in the past with a drabble about lipstick, but it was always something I wanted to come back to and this was very much an experiment in that. It's a little bit silly, but the shorter stories in this verse are meant to be that way.

It sits on Yuchan’s mind, the way Dongju’s eyes linger on him when they’re standing under the neon lights of the parking lot. He thinks nothing of it at first, used to the curious looks people usually give him, but where often it's dismissive, Dongju watches him differently. His eyebrows draw down, lips twisting and head cocked just the tiniest bit, and Yuchan knows that he’s figuring something out.

Yuchan leans forward on his bike, fingers tapping against the gas tank and Byeongkwan laughs beside him. “What’s the matter?”

Glancing up, Yuchan sticks his tongue out at him, before folding his arms over the handlebars and resting his cheek against them. His eyes flick back to where Sehyoon is mingling amongst the other group, falling still on Dongju tucked neatly into Hwanwoong’s side and looking like he’s still nervous about being here. “Trying to figure him out.”

“Dongju?” Byeongkwan asks, stepping in closer to run his hand through Yuchan’s hair. It’s grounding, a small comfort, as Yuchan works through all the possibilities and outlines all the information he has. He nods and Byeongkwan hums in acknowledgement, letting him find the words he wants to use to explain what he’s working through.

“I don’t know what he wants,” Yuchan finally gets out, narrowing down his own confusion into something easy to digest. That is the meat of it, that for how many races they’ve met up with the other group, Dongju is the one that Yuchan can’t figure out what he wants. 

Hwanwoong wants nothing more than a challenge, be it a race, or keeping someone in line. Keonhee loves the thrill, loves the atmosphere and the way he doesn’t have to do anything but race to prove himself to these people. Seoho is just watching for inspiration, while Geonhak and Youngjo are just happy to be there with their partners. It’s all so simple for them, but with Dongju, Yuchan can’t figure out what he wants from _him_.

“Baby,” Byeongkwan starts, voice soft on a laugh, and Yuchan looks back up at him to see him watching him with a smile on his face. His fingers trace gently over the curve of Yuchan’s ear, pushing his hair back, before cupping his cheek. “What he wants?”

Yuchan swallows, realizing that maybe he’s missed something, because Byeongkwan is looking at him like he’s already figured it out and has all the answers. It means Yuchan has the information he needs to figure it out, or he has to find the right question to ask. He sighs, listens to the swell of noise from the crowd, before letting his thoughts tumble out loud. “What he wants from me. He doesn’t want me to go away, he’s never been like the people who think I’m not worth anything. He wants to be friends, but he doesn’t want to fuck me. There’s something more though, hyung and I don’t know what it is.”

He knows the end of what he says comes out petulant, annoyed by his own inability to figure it out. He twists his face against his arms, looking back over to the others and catching the way Dongju’s eyes are on him yet again. As soon as he sees Yuchan looking back his way, his gaze jerks away and Yuchan exhales on a messy sigh.

All the while, Byeongkwan’s hand stays on him, moving back into his hair to drag his nails through. He doesn’t tease, doesn’t make Yuchan feel dumb for not being able to get this. Instead, he crouches down beside Yuchan’s bike and waits for him to look at him one last time, “Yuchan-ah, he wants to be like you.”

“What?” Yuchan asks, sitting up straight and looking down at Byeongkwan, who remains crouched. His hand falls to Yuchan’s thigh, giving a gentle squeeze as he waits for Yuchan to settle again before explaining.

“You’re on a circuit of racers that gave you shit for your makeup and the way you dressed, but you have never let it get to you. You wore a shorter skirt the next time and then raced, only to get your fastest time, just to prove you weren’t just our bitch. You’ve been saying “fuck you” to these people for so long that you don’t even notice it anymore.” Byeongkwan’s fingers tug at the hem of Yuchan’s skirt and he flushes at having it pointed out. His fingers dance in under the hem, the reminder of how his clothes make him feel when he’s at home rather than at a race.

“Hwanwoong was saying how he likes to wear pretty clothes at home, but we’ve never seen him dress up at a race. He’s always in the same jeans and shirt, and one of the boys' jackets. How could he not watch you and want what you have?”

“Oh,” Yuchan’s lips part in surprise, the information clicking into place amongst everything he already has.

“Think you can work with that?”

The smile on Byeongkwan’s face is so fucking fond and Yuchan can’t help the way he dips down to press a messy kiss to his cheek. He doesn’t care about the looks, or the way he’ll have to hear the insults as he lines up for his own race. It doesn’t matter, not when he loves doing this, not when Byeongkwan supports him so wholly, not when the others have never doubted him or made him feel ashamed. He loves this and understanding that that’s what Dongju wants, it makes everything click.

“I can, I can,” he laughs, bright and loud enough that Donghun glances over at them and cocks his head in question.

Byeongkwan pushes himself back up to his feet, leaning in to kiss the crown of Yuchan’s head. He doesn’t have to say anything, just smooths his hand over the back of Yuchan’s neck and gives a squeeze, a silent “I know you’ve got this” that has Yuchan smiling up at him.

This, this is definitely something he can work with and it sets him buzzing. 

Dongju won’t know what hit him.

* * *

Seoho ends up being the biggest obstacle.

It takes Yuchan promising that Seoho can borrow him for his next exhibit and tie him up however he wants, for Seoho to finally offer up Dongju’s measurements. There’s nothing about rope rigging that particularly interests him, it’s much more Junhee’s area, but there’s nothing about it he outwardly dislikes. It’s a fair trade and one that has Junhee laughing loudly when Yuchan tells him about the deal he made.

Donghun’s quick to grab Junhee around the neck and push him down, smiling softly at Yuchan. “I think it’s nice that you’re doing this for him, baby.”

Beside Yuchan, Sehyoon nods his head, gently pulling him into his lap as Yuchan continues to sort through what he needs on his phone. He does take the time to smile up at Donghun, and kiss Sehyoon’s cheek, before focusing back on the screen. “Thanks, hyungs.”

Once Seoho’s texted Yuchan what he’s needed, it’s _easy_.

It takes one call to Lia, where she suggests a shop that would be willing to fill Yuchan’s request, and then one phone call to the shop to set everything in order. It leaves one last thing to do and that’s where Yuchan hesitates.

His fingers hover over the keyboard on his phone, still for long enough that Sehyoon hooks his chin over his shoulder. “If you don’t try, there’s no way of knowing.”

Yuchan tilts his head, resting his cheek against Sehyoon and gives a shaky sigh. Sehyoon isn’t wrong and with his heart in his throat, he quickly writes up the text to send to Dongju before he can bring himself to call the whole thing off. He stops before he hits send and Sehyoon reaches around him to hit it in his stead, earning a loud squawk from Yuchan.

“You two get along well, it’ll be fine,” Sehyoon murmurs and Yuchan twists around in his arms to dig his fingers into Sehyoon’s sides. All it does is have Sehyoon pushing him down onto the couch in retaliation, pinning him in place and pressing kisses to his cheeks until Yuchan finally gives up on struggling and trying to yell his way free. 

A ding and Yuchan goes incredibly still, eyes darting to where his phone has fallen off the side of the couch in the struggle. Sehyoon reaches down for it, smiling at the screen before turning it to show Yuchan, “He says next Friday at four works.”

* * *

With everything out of his hands, Yuchan realizes that maybe he doesn’t have a whole lot to worry about. He gets a text from Hwanwoong telling him that he’s glad Yuchan is taking Dongju out for the day. The conversation doesn’t last long, but it’s enough for Yuchan to realize that Hwanwoong is genuinely glad and that maybe Seoho has let him in on what he has planned, which solidifies it.

It makes standing outside of the shop, waiting for Dongju to arrive, a little easier.

“Hi,” Yuchan greets as soon as he spots Dongju making his way over. Dongju drops his gaze, a small smile on his face as he shoves his hands into the pockets of his jacket.

“Hi, hyung.”

As soon as Dongju steps in beside him, he looks up at the shop, eyes going wide in confusion. “You didn’t... You didn’t tell me why you wanted me to come out.”

“No, it was a surprise,” Yuchan nods and Dongju’s gaze flicks to him for a moment, before he;s looking back up at the shop. 

“What are we doing?”

The question has Yuchan smiling, reaching out to slide his hand into Dongju’s pocket and take his hand in his own. Dongju startles, but doesn’t jerk away, just lets Yuchan lead him to the shop’s front door and inside. He gives a small squeak, the clearest sign that he’s nervous despite himself.

Yuchan doesn’t blame him. They’ve known each other for months, would be what Yuchan considers friends, but this is the first time he’s reached out to do anything with the other man. Being dragged into a clothing shop probably hadn’t been on his list of things he expected to be doing when Yuchan asked if he would be okay with going out with him for an afternoon.

“I’ve been stupid,” Yuchan says, pulling Dongju through the front of the shop and towards the back. The manager smiles at them, giving a small wave, before she settles back behind the front counter. A friend, Lia had called her, someone who would give them the space they needed and wouldn’t give them the help they asked for without judgement.

So far she’d been nothing but helpful and Yuchan was glad he’d asked Lia for help.

Dongju’s fingers tighten around Yuchan’s for a moment, and Yuchan knows he’ll need to explain himself quickly, before Dongju bolts. He can’t imagine how confused he is, when Yuchan’s done nothing to explain himself, has only dragged him into some strange shop and expected him to trust him.

The fact that Dongju has, that he hasn’t already run, Yuchan knows he would fight to make sure that his trust wasn’t misplaced.

“I’ve been stupid and I wanted to make up for it,” Yuchan continues, coming to a stop in front of the changing rooms. Dongju looks at him, eyes wide and Yuchan takes a moment to admire that he’s one of the prettiest people he’s seen. “I haven’t been the friend to you I should have been. I spent so long trying to figure you out and I could have just asked you. I’m dumb and sometimes it takes me a little bit to catch up, but now I’m here.”

“Hyung, I don’t know what that means,” Dongju whines, but he doesn’t make any effort to let go of Yuchan’s hand.

“I know, I’m sorry. I wanted to do something with you, okay? You can tell me to back off at any time and I’ll do it, but know I wanted to do this for you.” Yuchan hesitates for a moment, before letting go of Dongju’s hand. He watches as Dongju’s hands curl up against his chest, expression tight with confusion and nerves. Yuchan can’t blame him, he knows he would already have been running if he was in his position.

He reaches out to the table beside one of the dressing rooms, hands settling on the thick black fabric of a skirt. He pulls it up from the table and turns back to Dongju, watching his expression for any sign that this isn’t okay. “I try to pay attention, I do, but sometimes I miss things. Hwanwoong said you liked to dress in nice things and I’m an idiot, because I wasn’t connecting the dots. We’d been talking about my skirt and he said you had one like what I had on.”

“This one is a little bit longer, but it’s in your size and I would really like to get you something you can wear out.”

Yuchan can see the moment realization hits Dongju, can see it in the way his cheeks flush pink and how his eyes drop to the skirt in Yuchan’s hands.

“Would you try it on for me?”

The question startles Dongju, has him looking up sharply, something like fear on his face. “Try it on?”

“Mhm,” Yuchan nods, shifting where he stands. He can see the way Dongju sorts through everything, trying desperately to catch up with the fast pace that Yuchan’s set. He hasn’t given him any time, has left Dongju scrambling, but Yuchan’s never been one to hesitate once he’s set his mind to something. 

“Okay.”

Dongju carefully takes the skirt from Yuchan’s hands, walking around him to disappear into the dressing room.

Yuchan watches him step behind the door, heart in his throat. He wants to do this right, wants to offer Dongju the hand he had so desperately wished he’d had before everything. He listens to the soft noises of Dongju changing, the shuffle and little grumble of annoyance as Dongju probably notices that there’s no mirror in the room. A request from Yuchan that the owner had easily agreed to. 

He waits, long enough that he starts to wonder if Dongju will call it off, if he’ll storm out of the room in a flurry and rush off. He waits, until the door clicks open and feels everything in him freeze.

Dongju steps out of the dressing room, arms wrapped tight around himself as he stares at the floor. He’s lost the worn jeans he had been wearing and taken off the jacket that Yuchan assumed was Hwanwoong’s. It leaves him standing there with his long legs bare, the skirt reaching just above his knees and the sweater he’d been wearing making him look soft.

“You’re handsome,” Yuchan breathes and steps forward. The compliment must be a surprise, because Dongju jolts, surprise clear on his face. Yuchan smiles, stopping a few steps in front of him and holding out his hand. There’s a moment, before Dongju carefully unfolds his arms and reaches out to take it.

“I want to show you,” Yuchan says and leads Dongju towards the mirror the manager had carefully covered with a cloth for Yuchan. He sets Dongju in front of it, keeping his grasp on his hand and using his free one to reach for the cloth and tug it free. Through the mirror, he watches the way Dongju’s gaze immediately goes to himself, eyes wide and mouth falling open.

“It’s perfect on you,” another compliment as Yuchan drops the cloth and steps in behind Dongju. They make a sight, just two men in a pair of skirts and looks that would make most crowds take a second look at them. For Yuchan, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, they’re just clothing that make him feel pretty and something to be used to get what he wants, but he knows Dongju doesn’t have that, not yet at least.

Dongju drops his hand, fingers reaching down to tug at the skirt he’s wearing and Yuchan smiles, before settling his hands along Dongju’s waist to pull the skirt into sitting where it should. Dongju startles, but Yuchan only hums as he works his hands over the fabric, making sure it’s sitting exactly where it should, before he rests his fingers against Dongju’s waist and hooks his chin over his shoulder.

“You’re beautiful,” Yuchan says and watches the way Dongju’s hands twist together in front of him through the mirror. “It’s hard to remember that sometimes, when you have people telling you what you should or shouldn’t be wearing. How you shouldn’t be wearing makeup, or how long hair makes you look girly. It’s hard when the times we look soft, we’re treated differently.”

Yuchan lifts a hand, smooths it over Dongju’s shoulder and up into his hair. He pulls his hair tie free, ruffling his hand through Dongju’s hair and watching the way it falls around his face, admires the way it makes his features look sharper, a little more elegant. “It’s hard when dressing differently has us being told we’re just someones kept bitch.”

“You’re not though,” he continues, can see the way Dongju swallows and finally lifts his eyes in the mirror. “Just because you’re wearing things that make you feel pretty, doesn’t make you less than some guy in jeans and a shirt.” 

Yuchan steps back out from behind Dongju, turns him so that he’s facing him and meets his gaze head on. He knows how he looks, with his makeup heavier than he normally applies it in the daytime, his pleated skirt showing off his thighs and Sehyoon’s stolen sweater making him look smaller than he actually is. Knows that anyone could tell Dongju exactly what he is, but it wouldn’t hold the same weight, not when Yuchan’s the one who’s clawed his way through the insults and biases. “You’re handsome no matter what anyone else says and you’re not anyones kept girl.”

Reaching up, Yuchan takes Dongju’s face between his hands, smoothing his thumbs over the arches of his cheekbones and pulling him down so he can press their foreheads together. “You’re not less than them, okay?”

Dongju squeezes his eyes shut, his hands reaching out to twist into the front of Yuchan’s sweater and makes a soft sound in the back of his throat. It feels a little like surrender, the way Dongju sinks against him, body trembling as he clings to him. He gives a soft hiccup and Yuchan wraps his arms around him tight, fully aware of how overwhelming all of this must be.

“I got you,” Yuchan murmurs and it’s a promise he intends to keep.

* * *

Race nights are always loud, the crowds yelling, while the bikes and car engines cut through it all. It’s loud, but Yuchan wouldn’t trade it for the world. He glances over to where Junhee is goading Donghun into a fight, despite the fact the two of them are meant to line up in a few minutes, Byeongkwan snorting in his ear at the way the pair is acting up.

Sehyoon tugs gently at Yuchan’s hand, pulling his attention from his boyfriends, and he turns to him in question.

Before he can ask, Yuchan’s eyes catch on the crowd, going wide as he spots the group they’ve come to call friends. Youngjo waves, smiling wide, and Keonhee is babbling beside him excitedly to Seoho, but none of them are what catch Yuchan’s attention.

It’s the fact that Dongju’s pressed into Hwanwoong’s side, wearing one of the other’s jackets, with his hair pulled back and braided. His eyes are lined and even from here, Yuchan can tell he’s worked hard on his makeup, all the angles in his face highlighted, even in the shitty neon lights of the parking lot.

He looks good, but it’s the fact that he’s wearing the skirt Yuchan bought him that has Yuchan grinning.

They make their way over quickly, the boys keeping close to their youngest and talking loud enough to overwhelm any shit the crowd might try to hurl at them. They get close and Yuchan breaks into a laugh at the way Dongju immediately looks at him.

“You look amazing tonight, handsome.” Yuchan greets and the giggle it pulls from Dongju has Hwanwoong looking at him fondly.

“Thank you, my favourite hyung took me shopping,” Dongju teases and the way Dongju smiles at him is worth it all.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to come talk to me about these boys, possible prompts or anything at all: you can find me over at [twitter](https://twitter.com/Elesteria). I'm always down to chat at new people! You can also find me at [curiouscat](https://t.co/1yfgiUBE0r) if you have any thoughts, prompts or stuff that you're too nervous to say in public.


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